THE JIGSAW PUZZLE

STORY SHARING
The Jig Saw Puzzle
(A Reflection of Life Choices)
July 21/06
By Lynn Keeling
 Fitting the pieces together.  Some seemed to fit, for awhile that is.  Then gaps with nothing left to fill them.  Time to re juggle, shift, rearrange.  Take out what used to fit, making room for something new.  Change, changing, willing to grow, to flow with the current (the stream).  Noticing what is in my way, willing to make new paths.  Finding new ways around what blocks me in the now moment.  Willing to let go of past successes.  Want to move on, to change, to grow – expanding my horizons.  To explore the valleys as well as the tops of the highest mountains.  To love.  To really truly love myself.
 I move a few pieces of the jig saw puzzle around and they fit better in the empty spaces. Pieces that didn’t fit before, now slip easily into place, in place.  Everything is making sense.  Easy.  Encouraging.  Shifting slightly, bringing a newer perspective.  A joy.  The picture is being ‘peaced’ together, piece by piece, one at a time.  Slowly, lovingly, peacefully, with patience.  Slow going for awhile.  Nothing fitting.  Frustration mounting.
 Time to step back, take a break.  Go for a walk.  Leave the problem.  Go away. Leave it alone. Step aside.  Get out of my head.  Coffee break.  Lunch break.  Sleep on it.
 Come back to the puzzle refreshed and renewed.  New ideas, new eyes.  Fresh.  Ready to re engage.  To create.  To explore and discover.  What is it that doesn’t fit anymore?  Willing to re shuffle, to ruffle things up a bit.  Stir the pot and see what comes up.
 Funny how the same piece fits in 2 or 3 different places.  Where does it belong?  How will I know when I have got it right?  When will I know?
 The picture is coming together.  Nearing the end.  Fitting together as it should, so it seems.  Down to 8 empty spots now and 7 puzzle pieces.  Obvious that one piece is missing, lost – still to be found.  Mmmh!  None of the last seven pieces fit any which way no matter how hard I try to jam them in.  Could it be, is it possible – are there pieces in the wrong place?  Pieces that were comfortable where they were at the time, fitting well with the other pieces that fit in around them at the time.  And now we could just stay as we are – ignoring the change.  Not wanting to rock the boat or make waves or stir up the waters.  Not wanting to explore the unexplored depths of ourselves.  Willing to stay as we are.  Knowing there are extra pieces that don’t fit – holes yearning to be filled.  Our soul calling for completion.  Ripe and ready to move on – move forward.  Get on with business.  Break out of our shell.  Expand, break out of the box that binds us.  Create what we are here to create.  To hear, to see, to do, to be.  To find our way.  To experiment, try things on for size.  Remembering it may fit for awhile until we out grow it.
 It is the becoming attached to the ‘its’ of life.  A lesson in knowing when to let go.  And learning how to let go – detach.  Includes the grieving process, being patient with myself.  Being willing to change.  And sometimes being willing to be willing to change.  Recognizing, being aware.  Giving myself space and time to adjust to the readjusting.  Finding, asking for and accepting supportive help from others, workshops, retreats, books, tapes, jigsaw puzzles - open to seeing, hearing, noticing the guidance that comes my way – coincidences, nature, insights, ah ha’s.  Again willing to notice, it is time to step back, take a break, re group, re arrange, readjust, sleep on it.
 And when the time is right (Gods timing, not mine) the answer appears.  Move this piece to here and that piece shifts over to this place.  This piece fits in this space and one of the extra pieces fits comfortably into place in the new vacancy.
 So the pieces all fit.  Juggled around.  One piece left and it doesn’t belong.
 The surrounding pieces all seem to meld together.  Jelling well.  In the right place / space.  Something still out of place.  What is it?  How will I find it?  When will I know?
 Why is this so hard?  Why can’t I clearly see it?  Why am I making this so difficult?  Why do I care?  Why can’t I just leave well enough alone?  Who cares anyway?  Why not just leave well enough alone?  And the years go by seemingly in place.  And then along comes another reminder.  A shift – a workshop, retreat, book, tape, TV show, movie, a comment, - whatever the catalyst is.  And we have to decide.  And we choose to take another look.  To rediscover ourselves.  To reinvent, refresh, update, move on, upgrade, grow, grow up, (why do I resist writing grow up?)  Puzzled, I open my eyes.  Look closer.  Refreshed and renewed.  Willing to see, to explore and discover.  To create and recreate myself.  To expand, break out of my box, my shell, my cage.  Face my fears.  Fears of the unknown, the unexplored.
 Pieces in place have worked so well together.  It is a cozy known feeling of comfort.  It is comfortable.  Why upset the apple cart?  Why rock the cradle of life?  Leave things alone.  Don’t tamper with things.  Don’t fix what’s not broken you say!
 So here I am on the fence post.  Wobbling.  I could choose either way.  Same old, same old or something new, bigger, better.  Something more in tune with the full bigger picture – closer to completion.  More on purpose, on life’s path.  Besides, I can always change my mind.  That’s the great thing about choices.  I can try something on for size and if it works, great – if it doesn’t, I can make another choice / change my mind.  And if it fits for awhile great.  There may come a time where I outgrow it, noticing the other pieces aren’t fitting with ‘it’.  Time to readjust, shift, make choice, change, reshuffle, re gain, re grow, back up, regroup, shuffling up, refitting.
 So I decide to look again at the puzzle of life with open eyes, fresh eyes.  Childlike new eyes wide open, willing to explore and discover.  And there it is, plain as day.  A piece out of place.
 So I wiggle it out of its comfy space and try it in the empty hole.  It plops right in with ease.  Like it was meant to be.  No resistance.  Like it belonged.  And now for the extra piece – does it fit in the new empty place.  Plop.  Success.  As neat as can be.  All the surrounding pieces cheer with delight.  Feeling at home, aligned, fitting in with each other.  Re united at last.  The picture nearly complete.  One piece still missing.  Lost, still needing to be found.