The gift was an angry screaming exchange with Ralph. Over what? Not much really. Threads of the past tangled into this present moment. All our own stuff surfacing to the top and rearing its ugly head, wanting to be looked at I guessed.
I reverted to my old patterns. Quietly muttering, teeth gritting, seething as the hours pasted, trying as I might to use the relaxation calming tools I know so well. Those unspoken words of my conversation with Ralph playing over and over again in my head as I so needed to prove I was right.
The roller coaster of angry rose and fell, moments of wanting to scream and throw things mellowing out closer to being released. I was remembering to ask the why question, willing to look at myself to discover the source. Willing to figure out the lesson the universe was presenting, to make that healing shift.
I turned to the internet, looking up EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) for help. I had been meaning to get around to learning more about it and practicing it on myself. In this moment I reached out for help and found it as I watched and followed along with video clip after video clip. Each one leading to the next, speaking just what I had been asking the universe for – an abundance of wealth, health, and relationships so I could be heard and make a difference to others in this world. Releasing and letting go of the fear that keeps me stuck.
Things shifted and I thanked the universe for the gift Ralph had given me this day. My feelings of love grew even stronger, if that is possible.
The lesson was that the universe will guide me to where it wants me to be. Now if I could just make the chose to listen to, and act on, the more subtle nudges along the way.
I love myself and this wonderful process called life. Thank you GOD.
Oct 18, 2009
